Take Some Time

I’m scared
Of being open,
Of letting myself
relax
Enough to feel your touch,
Is it real?
Is this real?
Or just another illusion?
I can’t be,
won’t be,
taken for a fool,
again,
I leave my heart out,
But watch from a distance,
Guarded,
Prepared to snatch it back,
Should your ways appear
Less than

My heart,
She still hurts,
Weight of the past
Pulling,
With each beat,
Beating still,
Beating for you,
But I don’t trust anything anymore,
Familiar places and faces
Are now foreign to me,
Unfamiliar the motions,
For this dance of courtship
Is awkward,
And yet it pulls
Like a magnet,
The force making “us” natural,
Still
This heart she weeps,
Riddled With battle wounds,
This
is going to take
Some time.

Out There…

It hurts,
How deep you hurt me,
Betrayal doesn’t just fall away,
As it heals,
It leaves a visceral scar,
With an itch,
A deep burn
That remains,

I love
you,
And with that the pain pangs,
A throbbing suspicion lays under
my heart that wants your love,
But also values truth and trust,
Honesty,

Honestly,
Can you love me,
Without want or need,
Of an unknown more,
Question Mark,
Of something
Someone
Out

There…?

How to Heal

I can’t but feel the ache,
The burn of loss,
Each moment I am awake,
I’ve lost a trust,
A sense of companionship
Of a valued friend and lover,
I want to forgive,
But there is too much
Of the wound left untreated,
Too much,
Left unanswered,
I don’t know how to heal betrayal,
I hate you,
For this pain,
But I love you,
And that’s why I’m in this position,
I almost think this is your intent,
If you don’t want me
Just say it,
Speak up,
Use your words,
Loud and clear,
Let me figure out how to live,

Without you.

Woke

We’re all awake now,
The veil has been lifted,
It’s time to choose sides
Of history,
This is when out legacy is written,
By when we choose to speak,
And what we choose to say,
Or whose life we will lay down for,
Or if we’ll look at this
As just another day.

Called to Move

With so much on my mind
With so much on the world
It’s no wonder I cannot sleep,
I toss and turn,
With no specific thought,
Just a sense of worry,
For the times,
For the unsettled,
For the pained,
My ministerial heart,
Aches,
For past and present pains,
For systemic wrongs,
I long to change,
I am called to move,
Even in the night,
When tired eyes should close,
Should rest,
I am called to move,
Mobilized by my heart,
Pumping blood of my ancestors through my veins,
In and through brown limbs,
I am moved for change,
To actualize the humanity
I have seen in small doses,
On a grander scale,
To see my brothers and sisters with air filled lungs,
Chanting their message of change into being,
We move,
Not just legs,
But ideas,
Beliefs,
Of an equalized existence
Not pierced by the hate and apathy we have seen,
We move,
We move,
We move.

Rose Quartz

Soft, rose pink,
The quartz of my love,
Hangs close to my heart,
Amplifying my feeling,
My need to express
My need to be,
With the one I adore,
I have wrestled with
My feelings,
And rested with the knowledge,
That this is for whom I care,
For whom my heart revolves,
Soft,
But dense,
This love
I have for you.