Upheaval

Scattered,
Over the lands
Fragments of family,
Made from love,
Or something like it

Uprooted,
Upheaval,
Makes the grounds unsteady,
Uninhabitable,
In need of relocation

Roots are separated,
And replanted elsewhere,
To find stability,
And resources,
In another land

Division only spreads the space
Where seedlings find
Familiar roots
Next to which
They may grow

Advertisements

Love and Hurt

Written 2010

I do not know how to foster
the kind of patience, understanding,
and strength that i need, that this requires.
I don’t know how to keep sane
when everything around me
is pure insanity.
i don’t know how to be loving,
though I love,
when everything in my nature
tells me “this hurts, don’t accept, fight back”.
and so, i read and read,
searching in words to find the answers,
that i already know.
answers that are before me
just as stories, stories that tell our lives.
Our lives in different locations,
with different names, and dates. but no solutions,
no fixes.
we are the guinea pigs for this life,
and we’ve so far been dealt a difficult hand.
we love and we hurt,
we hurt and we love
and that is how we live
in our little home

30 Going on 15

On the edge of
15.
Pick a job
Any job
What would you like to be?
Career?
Your life.
Choose it.
Pick, pick, pick
Pick pick
Tick, tick, tick
Choose wisely.
Sign,
Here.
And here.
You like to do that thing that you mentioned,
that I wasn’t listening to,
and doesn’t matter because you can’t
make money, money,
money, doing
That
Here?
Thing
Here, here
Here, just take this and that,
and all those, and fill, and sign, here
And here,
And you had a question?
I couldn’t-
Here
Here
Here
And Here
Here you’ll find that anything you do has a paper trail
Change?
No, None here
Here the ink is permanent
That would waste too much
Time to work, work.
Now what was your occupational activity?
Oh yes, that one.
It doesn’t make much money, money
But somehow you’ll have to
Pay at the front,
We accept cash, credit, stocks, bonds, blood
Money to live
To learn,
Money for true happiness
For a good education,
Picket fence,
Marital bliss,
A dog, a house, a car,
2.5 kids.
What? You chose
See page 2000,
Its standard contractual arrangement,
See,
And you’ve already completed parts 4, 5, and 6
A change in the contract brings us back here
We’ve put you together,
Now we must tear you apart.
Now the parts you didn’t read,
You should have before!
No! No tears! There’s no time,
Hurry, you’re a mother,
An adult,
You’re about to be 30!
Now all you have are debts,
Your accomplishments
P(no school, past jobs, and your children don’t count),
Your finances,
Your failures,
Your reason for these claims,
Let’s spread them out.
Trauma? Relive every moment,
and then we’ll “figure something out”.
Childcare? No.
That’s something you must arrange
Should have been better prepared,
For this
For life. You don’t live and learn,
You best just know,
Count the cards just don’t get caught,
This is life,
the luck of the draw,
with notarized agreements.
Ok, you’re complete. Welcome to 30.
Please gather your child, your memories, triumphs, and trials,
and move back half your life,
to 15.

Next.

Bouquet

July 11, 2017

Starting  over,
Picking pieces
To put together
A bouquet
Of my own

Independence is fragrant  
With excitement
and trepidation  

But this is my own
And I  will  own
this arrangement
As one picked
by and for
All that is essential
to me

Separate Peace

April 11, 2017

His and hers boxes
Separate to separate
joined lives made anew

We divide but
Reconnect at peace as “we”:
Forever parents of you

Knowing the burden
On white flag children
We aim to be civil for you

May we remember
that troubles to separate
are to make peace
alliance in your name.